Things I Love Thursday

Sometimes the world is just a terrible shithole, and you don’t know what you have to feel good about so you end up procrastinating, but really you do need to see the good in the world before you end up just wondering what everything is for. Here are some of the things I’ve enjoyed in July despite all the rubbish going on.

So I’ve been following Random Encounters’ Five Nights at Freddy musical for a while, and they have finally updated with two new videos. It features Markiplier, MatPat and Natewantstobattle~ so yay there. And even though I don’t really follow the whole FNAF lore, I like the spin the Random Encounters team gave to the story – there’s some plot beyond just creepy animatronics and what nots, and the tunes are pretty catchy.

Yeeeah, so the steam summer sale went by quite a while back, but in my defense, this post was reaaaaally sitting in my drafts for quite a while, so yeah, I screencapped that image back then and finally got around to writing up this post. I am so productive like that.

I bought the whole Civilisation V (all the DLCs and everything) for only 12 bucks and it ate my life, in a way. It’s the whole ‘just one more turn’ trope and I can’t believe how much time I’ve spent on it. It reminded me back when Rome was popular, or at least my brother got me into the game, and I think I enjoyed it a little too much, with the whole building of temples and fire stations, and aqueducts. It was way more hands on than Civilisation V, which is fun in another manner.

There will be a new Neil Gaiman book, and it will be on Norse mythology, guess who grinned to herself and said ‘it’s about frigging time, Gaiman’, because frankly it is. We all know Gaiman likes mythology, and the Norse pantheon, because hello, American Gods had Odin, Loki and Thor, at least, plus his children’s book, Odd and the Frost Giants, is also related to the Norse myths.

FINALLY got my metaphorically grubby hands on Zero Time Dilemma, which I preordered ages ago, but it got delayed so MDA could label it as a M18 game, like c’mon, as if small kids want to play ZTD since there’s soooooo much reading and waiting and brain-using. It’s not some beat-them-up or button mashing with little plot, plus they have to have played 999, and VLR, to be interested in ZTD. I doubt kids want to bother with all the hassle.

I have high expectations, and I hope they won’t let me down, and can I just fangirl that Sugita is voicing Carlos (who I assume is the main character), and we got Daisuke Ono too! :DDDD These are two of the most recognisable seiyuus to me, especially Sugita. Not sure if it’s because I’ve heard over 300+ episodes of him in Gintama, plus all the other random anime that he pops up in or what.

Other 3DS games I got recently but haven’t really played yet: 7th Dragon III Code: VFD and Yokai Watch, yes, so slow, I know, but I finally caved, okay.

Watching Cry play Inside after a loooong time of not watching any LPs. I’m no good at platformers and it’s fun to hear Cry’s commentary as usual. Some other LPers that I follow are also doing this playthrough, but I think I’m gonna stick with Cry because I’m so biased.

Last year, I went to the Artscience Museum on my birthday to check out The Deep exhibition, which showcased deep sea creatures. This year, I headed down to the Singapore Art Museum to check out yet another nautical related exhibition. This one was less scientific and instead the featured works showed how the artists related to the sea.

I also managed to check out Imaginarium, which was mostly aimed at kids, but hey, on a weekday afternoon, there were hardly any kids around to annoy me. I liked the short films that they had selected, especially The Little Cousteau and Mon Ami Le Robot.

I think I love the sense of isolation and wistfulness displayed in both short films, and I thought the music they used fitted the scenes really well.

I’ve also finally watched the new Ghostbusters flick, and it was good! I reaaaaaally don’t understand the hate for it. Like c’mon, it’s not gamechanging or anything but it was a fun summer romp, just like all those brainless Transformers or superheroes movies. I thought the movie was a bit thin in terms of plot, but the characters were fun, and though some of the jokes were pretty cheesy, the writing was still snappy and tight.

Speaking of summer romps – Star Trek Beyond! :D Chris Pine soothes all pain, because I think he’s super hot. Which might not be everyone’s opinion. There were cliches galore – Kirk acting all morose and kind of jaded after all his escapades, in which he seems to spend most of the time running for his life (it’s got to be a trope already). And there’s the whole Spock and Bones – snarky comrades-in-arms – working together and throwing all sort of banter, plus Spock and his awkwardness in his dealings with Uhura, the possibility that the Spock-Kirk combo may be ruined, Chekov and Sulu and Scotty throwing about sciencey jargon, especially Scotty with his ‘magic’ mojo at modifying spaceships, monstrous looking villains with unnatural skin colours, and unexpected allies, and of course, the Enterprise crew getting to act like big damn heroes – unless you’re a nameless red shirt, then you die.

Now to just wait for Suicide Squad :DDDD Jared Leto~ sorry, showing bias again.

In real life, I had a lovely family dinner at a Japanese hotpot restaurant, as well as a meet up with the clique where we had ramen! and dessert! And they got me booze as a present, which made my mother laugh in a not-so-pleased manner because my friends think I’m an alcoholic.

Another friend got me Neko Atsume related stuff, since he knows that I’ve finally gotten all the cats and all their mementos and now I’m just playing to collect currency. Because eh, why not.


so far from the shore

This is me continuing my spiral into self-induced depression, I suppose. But I recently got around to listening to the so popular Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots and the cynic in me just wanted to sit down and laugh a little at how innocent the lyrics are. Of course, personal opinions and my own jaded thoughts probably warped the song from its original purpose.

See, the lyrics that I find questionable runs as:

Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days,
When our momma sang us to sleep but now we’re stressed out.
Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days,
When our momma sang us to sleep but now we’re stressed out.

We used to play pretend, give each other different names,
We would build a rocket ship and then we’d fly it far away,
Used to dream of outer space but now they’re laughing at our face,
Saying, “Wake up, you need to make money.”

And I can’t help but feel like shaking the people who identify with these lines. Do you know why you could play pretend and why you didn’t get all stressed out, and why your mom’s singing could put you at ease? Because she gave up on her dreams so that you could grow up healthy and happy.

A journalist wrote of her own turbulent childhood where she had to grow up with a mother who was eccentric and in a way, it left scars on the writer.

She grew up an only child in a penthouse in New York’s Upper East Side. Her mother was a poet, her father a diplomat. He retreated to Thailand when the marriage failed and so, for much of the year, it was just Leve, her mother and her mother’s party guests. There were frequent raucous parties, attended by the likes of Saul Bellow, Philip Roth, Norman Mailer, belly dancers, balloon magicians, Andy Warhol and “people she met in the elevator”, Leve says. “It was very eccentric.” Sometimes the guests had to wait hours before her mother would appear, wrapped in a towel and covered with bubbles. If they were beguiled, her daughter wasn’t: “At 11pm I’d hear, ‘Everybody! Stop talking! It’s time for the music!’ And I’d be lying in bed, panicked, because I had to go to school the next day. I didn’t care who these people were. What mattered to me was that they were behaving inappropriately and they were inconsiderate to me. I needed to set my own boundaries, because nobody else was setting them.”


“It came as a big surprise to me that she didn’t love me,” she replies. “I thought it was going to be, ‘Thank you, Mommy, for everything you gave me.’ I tried to make her life as beautiful as possible. I had a very famous salon in New York.” (source)

Is it so strange to tell your kid that ‘Hey, maybe you need to think about making money? I can’t possibly support you financially when I’m close to the retirement age, and don’t you think it’s funny how you can faff around dreaming while I have to put bread on the table? Surely you don’t think that my dream is to look after my kids until the day I drop dead?’

Which might be me putting too much of myself into that reading, because I’m currently being a total NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training), and people keep asking me when I’m going to get a job.

Don’t you find it funny how we were bombarded with motivational lines such as ‘follow your dreams’, ‘set high goals’, ‘you can do whatever if you put your mind to it’ etc. But to be honest, if we all followed our dreams and based our careers on our childhood fantasies, where would society be? Surely the number of kids thinking that they wanted to be investment traders or janitors or bus drivers are minute. For those kids who grew up and got sensible jobs, were they selling out? Did they decide that they could never because astronauts, rock stars, or firefighters, and settled for less and because of that, they lost when they put themselves in the rat race?

I suppose a part of me feels guilty – how much do I know about my mother beyond the fact that she is my mother? That she nags too much and annoys the hell out of me and is probably the only person I hate and love at the same time. Which makes me the most ungrateful bastard who doesn’t deserve everything that I have now.

We don’t seem to think about our parental figures as real people. They had to have proper hopes and dreams, did they ever achieve any of them? Or did we get in the way of their goals? Sure, most decent parents probably didn’t see their kids as a burden, but perhaps as another type of dream, different from what they originally thought about when they were younger themselves. But in the case of opportunity cost, maybe the kid was a better choice? Idk I don’t ever want to have children; I’m too selfish to prioritise another human being over my own desires. I don’t think I can see a kid as anything but an obstacle to whatever I want.

Instead of going out with her friends on Sundays or resting after a hectic week of work, my mother chooses to do extra housework, buys a shit ton of groceries and cooks a feast because my brothers and their families would come over. I’m sure we would all be okay if we got take out instead, but in her mind, since they only visit once a week, she has to make sure that they eat properly (she doesn’t think they eat healthy food on their own, I suppose), and that means homecooked food.

I don’t know where I’m going with this, I just had a kneejerk reaction to a song, and I guess I felt too much emotions for a couple of lines because of where I am currently, or who knows, maybe I just have too much time on my hands.

can we be sad for a moment? | a mixtape to be alone with

to be honest, I hope this is some sort of PMS roller coaster of hormones and emotions, and not symptomatic of a larger issue like depression or something (because hey, we self-diagnose all the time and come up with the worst case scenarios).

01 Evanescence — Bring Me To Life (piano cover)
bring me to life (I’ve been living a lie, there’s nothing inside)

02 Green Day – 21 Guns
do you know what’s worth fighting for / when it’s not worth dying for?

03 Linkin Park – Breaking the Habit
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for / or why I have to scream

04 The Rasmus – Last Waltz
I can’t explain it, I feel insecure / say it simple: “You die just to live again.”

05 Coldplay – Fix You
when you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep

06 Alan Walker ft. Iselin Solheim – Sing Me to Sleep
won’t you sing me to sleep now?

07 Ólafur Arnalds ft. Arnór Dan – For Now I am Winter
for now I am winter / lungs debut…