some honesty

I posted this once, but I locked it as a password protected post because I guess I didn’t want to be honest about what I wanted? Because I haven’t exactly come to terms with the fact that I don’t really want to be climbing the corporate ladder or to work in a crazy creative job that takes up weird hours of my life. Sure, a 9 to 5 (6:30 if we’re being exact) job is dull and terrible but do I really want a job that expects me to be running around at 4 in the frigging morning or working till 2 am or something?

Sorry, I don’t want that. I want my leisure time, I want to sleep at relatively normal hours. I don’t want a job that will take up my life or my outside time – that time should be spent on things I enjoy, like having a cup of tea or checking out new books or lounging around in metaphorical sweatpants (I actually don’t own any) marathoning tv shows. I want to be able to drop everything and take a break away to foreign countries and not do any work, for instance, I want to wake up late and browse random goods at a flea market somewhere in Turkey, I want to buy random candy in a convenience store in Japan, I want to eat bad pub food somewhere in the UK, I want to buy crazy cheap cosmetics in an Ulta or Sephora in the US etc.

And I think I’m glad my mother didn’t make a fuss when I told her that I’m not the competitive type, I don’t expect myself to become a boss or a high flyer in my career nor did I want to be some sort of a kept housewife because that shit is unstable, yo. You don’t know when you’re going to be divorced/widowed/whatever and you can’t depend on other people to give you money. That’s dumb and impractical and you won’t know how to enter a workforce if you aren’t already working.

So yeah, I guess this is me facing my future in a head-on manner without pretending to be someone who is career driven and determined to win all the promotions and stuff. Nah, that’s not who I was, that’s not who I am, and unless something happens in the future, that’s not who I’m going to be.


2 thoughts on “some honesty

  1. A month too late and it probably doesn’t matter but dude I respect the shit out of you for this, for being sure of what you want and being unapologetic about it. Keep on keeping on , I request the bumpiest of fists next time I see you.

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